So Sometimes It's Ok

Well, the trail was a lot of fun. We were gone for 4 days, which was the perfect amount. We hiked in and set up camp (day 1), hiked to a lake and back (day 2), hiked through a pass over the continental divide (day 3), and then hiked out (day 4). The hiking wasn't too strenuous, but it did rain a lot. The guide's little sister (who works in the kitchen out here) came with us, and she's going to Samford in the fall, so it was nice to spend time with her and get to hang out before school in a month.

But now that I am home and clean, I am a little sad for several reasons.
First: my camera has decided to say "Err 99: Shooting is not possible. Turn the power switch to and again or re-install the battery." But to no avail - it won't work. It won't let me take any pictures. I called Canon, and it's going to be a lot of money to have it fixed.
Second: For the past 4 days I've been looking forward to coming back and listening to my ipod while I just lay in my bed and do nothing. I left my ipod on my nightstand or on my bed, but it is no where to be found. So I'm thinking that someone borrowed it, and forgot to return it. So I left a note on the kitchen table that says, "Dear Liz's Ipod, I miss you a lot. Please come home. - love, Liz." Hopefully someone will find it and bring it back to me. But either way, I would love to be listening to Gregory Alan Isakov or Explosions in the Sky or Dierks Bentley right now. Dang it.
Third: I am on the all day tomorrow, and I have to be a breakfast with my group at 7:10. So no sleeping in, even though I just got off of the trail.
Fourth: I have a migraine.
Fifth: I am out of Nexium.

Ok, that is enough complaining. I am going to lay in my bed and embroider. I would love to take a picture of all of my embroidery so far (a unicorn, a dolphin, two birds, an owl, and a giraffe), but my camera is broken, like I said. I think I am about to do an elephant with two little birdies on it's back. But here are some pictures. The first one is of me and Katy at Cottonwood Lake. And the second is of me and my trophy on top of the continental divide.

So It's Been Way Too Long

Well. I haven't blogged in like 2+ weeks, so I need to do it now, because I'm going on the trail for 4 days, starting tomorrow morning.

These are a bunch of things I've been thinking about lately. They're very disorganized and choppy. But here they are:

1. I have a great longing for calm water. A pool. The lake. An Alabama river. The ocean. I just love to swim, and warm, calm water (without eddies, strainers, holes, sleepers, etc.) sounds so inviting. I would also love to water ski, tube, float.

2. I'm going back to school in 3 weeks. I don't really want to go.

I want to hang out with Pittman, but I don't want to go back. I also want to change my major. But I'm not sure if it's because I want to do something else, or if I'm just scared of Organic 2 with Dr. Lampkins. I sort of would like to transfer schools as well. Or take a semester to do something different, outside of Alabama. But that's what this summer has been. A time of fun, growth, and freedom. So I need to snap out of this and get excited about school.

3. I had a rough day the other day, and it was about 98% because I was just exhausted, physically and mentally, but I definitely cried in front of and to two boys (one was Jeff, but then one of them was my friend Logan). I never would have cried in front of anybody before I came out here, but especially not a boy. God has been teaching me a lot about living freely since I've been in Colorado, even if that's just being willing to be vulnerable and cry in front of people. And God has also provided great friends who encourage me to be myself, but also to live in Christ's love and freedom.

But anyways, I was thinking about how God uses hard things in our lives, and I found this quote that I thought was interesting: "All of us have seen good come out of disaster - the blessing in disguise. When you expect good to come from negativity, it will. What you think about, you bring about." - Joyce Duco. So I guess it's saying that hard things are going to happen, but our reactions to and attitudes towards difficult things determine whether it will help us grow or hold us back. And what we think is horrible at the moment, can really be a good thing when we look back on it. I know that that was the case for my terrible day.

Also, we were singing a song at staff worship last night, and I don't remember what it was called, but there was a line in the song that essentially said "we are filled to be emptied again." And I thought that was interesting. God breaks us down and then fills us with his love so that that love may overflow onto those around us. I've been praying that He would fill me while I'm in such a strong community here at Noah's, so that when I go back to school and home, that that love will flow onto Pittman, Samford, Birmingham, College Ave, and the Eastern Shore.

4. Alba is talking about a boy she just realized that she doesn't have a crush on anymore, and she just said "if there's no spark, there's not going to be a fire." What a wise little Spaniard.

5. Pinball sucks most of the time. You don't need any forward strokes in Zoom Flume. Left of Tight Squeeze is wonderful. Below Big Drop is the best place for an ONB. Bottleneck is impossible to do without at least 2 bumps. Dang it. Raft Ripper is so much fun if you start left early. Hecla is such an easy eddy now.

I love rentals.

Those were a lot of words.

I'll be on the trail until Friday, and then my parents are coming here on Saturday. I am so excited.

So It's Fun Fun

Well after a hard week's work, it is really nice to have a day off. Just to rest and relax and have fun. Not that guiding isn't fun, but it's sort of stressful fun, because people's lives are essentially in my hands, and if something goes wrong on the river, it can go really wrong really fast. But on my days off, I can have fun fun, without having to worry about risking the lives of others.

So today, Anna and I had the day off, and Bryan, Drew, and Katy were all on-call, so after the three of them were all clear of being called in, we took off to the Mt. Princeton Hot Springs. Yes, the same place I busted my leg open. But at a different part of the Hot Springs, there's a cooler pool, that has a huge water slide. The first time we went down the slide, we actually obeyed the rules, went down with only 2 or 3 people to a mat, and we faced forwards with our feet forwards. Bump that from then on. Once the lifeguards switched and the one who didn't care about anything got on the stand, we went down 5 at a time, we pushed each other off the mats half way down, and we would spin around and go backwards or headfirst. It was so so fun.

It's cool to see how after this past year, God has provided some restoration through such good, solid, fun friends, with whom I can relax with and just have fun. And to have people who know me, who don't judge me, who I can laugh with, who I can grow with.

And SB now freaking lives in Mobile, relatively close to my parents house, so it'll be so fun to go home now.

So Here We Go Again

Well, I was just catching up on the blogs that I follow, well the one that I follow, and SB was talking about her trip to Hungary that she just returned from. She was talking about lessons that she learned while she was there. And like I've said before, it helps me a lot when people talk things out with me and help me organize and put words to my thoughts. All of that to say, I feel like Sara Beth summed up my past year in two sentences, without even talking to me or anything. She was talking about a devotional they did on John 10:9, in which Jesus says "I am the door; whoever enters through me will be saved. He will come in and go out, and find pasture." On that, SB said, "Sometimes He sends us away from the "flock," meaning away from our comfort zone, away from even our group of friends and family and church body. He purposefully sends us out, even out of situations that aren't necessarily wrong, to do His will. "

Bingo.

I feel like God has put me almost 100% outside of my comfort zone emotionally, spiritually, physically, and socially since last August. Not because any of those things were necessarily wrong, but to do his will. And although I'm not really sure what "his will" is for my life at this moment, I just have to trust that he has a purpose, and that he will give me the wisdom and strength that I need.

I also feel like I've been talking a whole lot about this past year and how hard it was - sorry about that. It was one of those things where in the midst of it, I just looked towards the future, so it wasn't until this summer when I reflected back on the school year, that I realized how challenging it was. But little things, like SB's post, just provoke more thought on the matter.

So It's a New Challenge

Well the water is at 800 cfs, so 4.5 times lower than the peak. And there's one major difference now: rocks. Unlike at high water, there are actually rocks in the river. And a lot of them at that. So although the trip may not be as exciting for guests, it is a lot more challenging for guides. So that has been interesting to deal with that, because the first time I saw the water was with customers in my boat, we do low water routes now, and also because it can get really frustrating hitting rocks.

Also, I was thinking the other day about the concept of aquaintance-ship vs. friendship, and how in a community, we essentially have to choose people to be friends with, whether it is subconscious or purposeful. When you're surrounded by tons of great people, or even by not so great people, you can't be good friends with everyone, so you have certain "chosen ones" who you pursue, who you trust, and with whom you are vulnerable. While you still spend some time with everyone in the community, there are definitely people with whom you are closer to, and then those that you don't know as well, but who also don't know you as well. But what really sucks, is when the ones you have chosen start to fade out of your life and you're left not really knowing who your friends are, and not knowing if you should keep pursuing those people, or start pursuing other people. But those are just some words.

I've been guiding the past week, but today I'm on babysitting duty again. So it'll be just another day with the 3 little indians.

So the Adventures of the Three Little Indians

Well the other day I babysat the 2 kids of one of the Noah's staff members. As soon as I got there though, the kids, a 10 year old boy and an 8 year old girl, informed me that I was not their babysitter (because they are not babies and they do not sit), but their Adventure Program Director.

I knew I was in over my head as soon as they said that.

After getting a tour of their house, they gave me 2 feathers for my hair, a bandana, and an indian shirt, and they informed me that we were going to "the farm." Now as I have said earlier, my imagination is tiny. But these kids lived in a whole different world at this farm. They have a fort on "Adventure Island" and get daily missions from "Mr. Orville" and have to avoid a "wicked witch." Thankfully Mr. Orville gave us the day off after we got there, but it was actually really cool and refreshing to see the creativity and innocence that these 2 kids still have. It was nice to be able to run through fields, wade through streams, and just play outside. And I brought my camera, so I ended up just taking the pictures the whole time, and pretending like we were on a photography adventure. They played along, and even made me write about it in their "The Adventures of the 3 Little Indians" book that is made out of construction paper tied together with ribbon, that all of their Adventure Program Directors have to write in at the end of every day of adventures. So that was my day, but here are some of the pictures: